Abstract: The author examines how writing shapes her practice and how she nurses, her way of being and doing. She notes that “as human beings we cannot be broken into subsets, my personal and professional being inform each other, therefore you will find woven into the fabric of this paper my personal and professional becoming united by the dominant thread of nursing”. The paper is structured using the different phases of her career as a staff nurse, nurse practitioner and charge nurse. In each section she has linked the stories of children and young adults with reflections on her writing and how it has impacted her practice. She goes on to say that question and reflection are vital adjuncts to nurses' development as individual practitioners and to the profession. They facilitate journeying past the superficial into the deep of a relationship with patients and colleagues. She identifies a responsibility as nurses is to engage with the individual and help them find a space where they can regain a sense of hope and personal power. This paper follows the author's journey, leaving her with a clearer understanding of who she is and how she nurses.

Abstract: The aims of this study were to illuminate the joint constructions of exemplary nurses and their lived experiences of being and becoming one. Inherent in being 'exemplary' was the notion of 'becoming', which involved the integration of knowledge and experiences through reflecting on the day-to-day of 'being a nurse'. Being exemplary was not about perfection but learning from every experience and integrating these into becoming. The author developed a creative qualitative and participatory method. Ten exemplary nurses were recruited and interviewed three times. They also provided supplementary data such as photos, poetry and writings. Analysis occurred through first and second level categorising and the use of writing as method. Writing became a way of knowing – assisting discovery and allowing reflection on the data in order to connect the categories and themes together in a coherent and workable whole. The author reports that the above method led to the following emergent findings. The pivotal construct was Authentic Being, through living a reflective life, surrounded by the major constructs of Love of Nursing, Making a Difference, Critical Friends, Walking the Talk and Backpack patients. These constructs directed a specific and comprehensive review of both the philosophical and nursing literature. This review was not used to expand or enlarge the findings but to enlighten, illuminate and clarify. Significant philosophical ideas were extended, developed and synthesised with the findings. The author suggests that the new knowledge that emerged from this research has profound implications for everyday nursing practice, undergraduate and post graduate nursing education, and for Charge Nurses and Senior Nurses, who are of vital importance as role models, mentors and critical friends. The results are significant and are important for nurses and the nursing profession and contribute to, and advance, nursing knowledge.

Abstract: This study traces the author's transition from being a mental health nurse to becoming a facilitator of an education programme, the Health and Wellbeing course, for those in recovery from mental illnesses. Within this transition, she describes a journey from disease-focused paradigms toward emancipatory paradigms, evidenced by her application of the recovery approach to her teaching. The 'recovery approach' proposed by the Mental Health Commission in November 1998, and other models of health, are explored using the methodology of descriptive/interpretive philosophical inquiry, autobiographical narrative and a dialectical research design. The author draws from the philosophies of phenomenology and existentialism to present excerpts from her journals, exemplars, poetry and artwork which illuminate epiphanies occurring as she integrates health paradigms in the design of the Health and Wellbeing course. Within this process the recovery approach is revealed as being consistent with the teaching principles of the Health and Wellbeing course. The author goes on to say that the dialectical research design reveals paradoxes and transformations in nursing, medical, psychological, and humanistic paradigms within the New Zealand socio-political context from the 1970s to 2003. The way these are integrated into her practice as an educator, becomes evident in the dialectical research cycles of being, thinking, developing a project, the encounter of teaching, making sense and communication. These cycles reveal her being in the roles of nurse and educator and the thinking through of paradigms that lead to the design and philosophy of a Health and Wellbeing course, the encounter of teaching, and the communication of insights gained. The author's main objective is to show the importance of nurses and educators developing a reflective consciousness when working with sufferers of mental illness. This reflective consciousness involves three levels: The primary level, or raw experience; the social level, or our socio-political contexts and social values, and, the realised level, insights gained about knowledge and experience.